Turns Out....

Remember "Norman the Lonely"?

Turns out, he is a SHE. Did you know that male Indian Runner ducks don't quack? Well, "Norman" does. She will henceforth be known as Nora, if we can kick the habit of calling her a he. ;)

It's the Little Things

My dear friend Joy sent this to me via e-mail recently, and it touched my heart.

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.'

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him...

He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.

My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.’

He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!' There was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.

I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books every day!’ He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.

When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.

He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak.

Graduation day, I saw Kyle.

He looked great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous! Today was one of those days.

I could see that he was nervous about his speech.

So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!'

He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled....' Thanks,' he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began ...'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends....I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.'

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the first day we met.

He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home.

He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.

'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.'

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.
Not until that moment did I realize its depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each other’s lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others.

'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.'

There is no beginning or end. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift.

I have a firm belief in this, that with a small gesture you can make all the difference. I have been told of my actions having this effect, but much more importantly to me, I have had others follow promptings to reach out to me, and through that, have changed my perspective on life and how I feel about myself.

Some of you may have heard this from me before, but it was pivotal to me so I will share it again. Last summer, during a point of confusion and great difficulty in my life, I received a phone call. I was in a bad place, so I probably let the call go to voice mail when it came through, but it came from a friend who, bless her heart, admittedly "didn't know why [she] was calling" and then went on to tell me that she had been thinking about needing to call me for a few days. Please note, we weren't that close at the time. I knew her, I respected her, and I believed she had positive feelings towards me, but the idea that she was receiving and listening to promptings on my behalf, especially where it had to feel so awkward to call....

She went on to let me know that she was there for me and a few other lovely sentiments. But what moved my heart so much was when she spoke, "I want you to know that I love you." The power of those words, spoken with such sincerity, by someone with no obligation to say them, buckled my knees and brought me to tears. I needed so badly at that very moment to hear that someone loved me.

This message remains to this day in my voice mailbox.

We are God's angels and agents. His work cannot go forward without us doing as He asks. And part of what He asks is that we ask whom we should help. Many times it will feel awkward, and we might wonder why, or if what we do might make someone else uncomfortable, but we have to do it. It's for our growth, but at the same time, you never really know what kind of an impact you can make. And we will be responsible for those missed opportunities.

I believe that Christ attained His level of perfection in deep correlation to His constant devoted service to others. We've all heard the saying, "God is Love." There is a reason for that. Every person on this planet has their own personal struggles, failings, and pain. But we are not designed to suffer them alone. And the beauty of reaching out with love is how it beautifies and edifies every person involved. There are no losers in the scenario. Even if you reach out and are rejected, you are free to receive the blessings waiting in store for you, and I firmly believe, that the positive energy you offered to someone else does not go to waste. It plants itself in the other person's heart, whether they know it or not.

I know I'm preaching to the choir here on loving service. But what I guess I feel like I'm trying to say, perhaps for myself more than any of you, is that no offering is too small, particularly if its an offering you know Father wants you to make. As in my example, it wasn't anything as devastating as turning the tides on a suicide. Regardless, I would say that one phone call did in fact change my life. You never know the far-reaching effect you may have. But He does. Each of His children have particular gifts designed to build up and create goodness. We can't see all the time how our gifts might help, or even what our gifts are. But He does, and can, and will, teach us what they are and how to use them.

Thank you for all the ways you reach out to me and offer support. I can't tell you how the most basic of unsolicited encouragement lifts my soul. You each have so much "wonderful" inside of you. Thank you so much for sharing it with me, and with the world around you. This world...it's a more beautiful place because of you.

Bringing the Crew Up to Speed

2011. This year has been eventful so far. Particularly on the homestead. And...frankly...particularly in a negative way. We've had our share of successes, too, but *sighing and shaking head.* I LOVE Sam for his energy and focus and wanting to do this for our family, and what it has taught us all. But, what happened in the first few months of this year...well, they are exactly the reason why I didn't want to marry a farmer!

Growing up in a rural ag community, so much hangs on the crops. I remember from a very young age being on edge, worrying about the words "blight" and "drought" etc. coming up in conversations. I remember being so concerned about hard frosts and too much rain, or too little rain, or rain too early or too late in the season. I hated it. I wanted nothing to do with that kind of stress that was completely outside the scope of human control.

And, yet, here I am, back in the middle of it.

True, and thankfully, our livelihood does not depends upon it. But, I'm beginning to wonder if it is just as difficult on me emotionally! Okay, probably not, but still!

We had several does kid early this year. We had so many kids! It was awesome! Every time a new baby anything is born, it's a wonderful experience. I sort of felt, "Wow, we might come ahead in the game this time." We had several stillborns, at least one for each kidding, which was not fun, but as we only had one batch of doubles, it wasn't a big deal. Just one of those things. UNTIL the boys started dying.

It was concerning to me that all the stillborns were male, but when the other males started getting sick, it was a big deal to me. All these babies had the same sire and it was FREAKING me out. Was there some serious genetic defect he was passing on to his male babies??

One thing I've learned this year is that goats, as herd animals, won't manifest symptoms of illness unless extremely ill. I mean, there are symptoms, if you pay attention to your herd. You can tell if one of your animals is looking or acting "off," but if they are sick with something you haven't seen before, if you find them acting ill, like lethargic, lying on the ground, moaning, those types of things, your goat is already at death's door. To let on earlier is a sign of weakness reflecting on the entire herd, and the instinctive programming won't allow that. So, at death's door is how we kept finding our kids. It got so bad, I almost didn't want to enter the barn everyday, I was so concerned about what I would find. I got to the point that I didn't know if I could handle one more goat dying.

Every time, Sam and I would try to nurse them back to health. Sam's medical background is very helpful around the homestead, and it was nice to feel like we were helping a little. But, in the end, there was nothing we could do. Each time, we'd bring them in the house, tube feed them, give IV fluids, work to keep them warm. Every time they would improve, look like they were getting stronger and healing, and then....

It's rough raising animals that are "exotic" enough to the United States that vets don't know all that much about them, so we were doing a lot of trial and error and relying on the internet a lot. Finally, we were able to capture a stool sample and the vet did finally diagnose a parasite. So, we knew what to do with the rest of them, thankfully, but not before we lost three little boys.

And THEN...grrrr. In December we decided we needed a barn dog to fend off the possibility of the fox who decimated our chicken brood last year, including our rooster, returning. As it turned out, dogs are not the best guard animals for goats. One of our favorite kid girls was lost to this animal last month. Needless to say, we no longer have a barn dog.

Next adventure: ducks. Sam's been very concerned about our pest population, particularly the Japanese beetles that have been mentioned in previous posts. We don't want to use pesticides, so it takes getting a little creative, and looking into several different methods. One of them is DUCKS. Who knew? :) Not me. Apparently, they are great foragers. So, we invested in 20 Indian Runner eggs to incubate and add the results to our farm. UNFORTUNATELY, the egg turner got unplugged at some point, which left us with ONE surviving duck.

Dubbed "Norman the Lonely," :) he is something of a miracle. He should not have survived, and yet he did! We have our suspicions about his...um...soundness :) but he's kind of fun to have around, nonetheless.

Here he is, starting to lose his baby feathers, and his downy white is starting to come in. We don't even know if he's really a boy :) but he makes us laugh.

Norman loves to follow his people around. His favorite place to be is between our feet. LOL. This has resulted in more than one inadvertent kick that has sent Norman tumbling. Not enough to deter him, because he still walks there. Whatever makes him happy, I guess.

To make up for our losses with the Indian Runners, Sam ordered some Welsh Harlequin ducklings. We decided to not mess around with incubating eggs this time. (Hooray!) They arrived earlier in the week. Aren't they sweet?

We are also taking on the challenge of pigs again this year. I used to love pigs. Now, not so much. YUCK. But, it's difficult to argue with the striking argument the freezer full of delicious makes.



Sam's been fantastic, listening to all of my complaints and trying to rectify them. I didn't want the pigs rooting up the pasture land. I didn't want the huge holes in ground. I didn't want to deal with the smell if I could avoid it at all. I wanted the feeding and watering system improved. :) I really did not want to do pigs again. So, he did his homework, as he is so good at doing, and found solutions across the board. He continually impresses me.

I still don't like the pigs. Which is good, I guess, because they will be dinner someday. :) But, at least they aren't a "problem" anymore.

So, there you go, crew. :) That's what we've been doing around here, as far as the animals go. I still need to fill you in on all the work Sam's done in the garden, but that will be another post. Fun times! :) We love our little Serenity Farm!

We Have News...

It seems come the end of August, we will have one very happy daddy.

We are having a BOY!

We are excited and trepidatious about this new adventure...two girls set you in a slightly different rhythm, but I grew up with four boys...so, it shouldn't feel too unfamiliar, right? ;)

Our Misadventure in Chana

A few weeks back, we were out picking up goat feed. (Sometimes it smacks me in the face: "Woah. Our family really raises goats. Hm.) Sam found this local guy who mills his own feed that is supposedly superior to what you can find in the feed store and is similarly priced. So, off we went to Chana, about a half an hour away.

We've been trying to acclimate Sadie to riding in the car lately, so we brought her along. As Sam was leading her out, I noted she didn't have her harness on, and since Sam didn't seem concerned about it, I didn't grab it, or her leash. (Can you see where this is going?)

We arrive in Chana, and Sam gets out of the car, opens the back hatch, and goes to find the seller. I was doing something I'm sure very important in the front seat, and wasn't paying attention to Sadie. The girls, also occupied, weren't really paying attention, either, but they have the excuse of being young. :) Anyway, I feel the back of the car depress and turn to see Sadie has jumped into the back of the car. I have time to get out, "Sadie, NO!" before she's OUTTA THERE.

I'm out of the car and trying to chase her, calling to Sam to come out, screaming for Sadie to stop. I don't know how many of you are acquainted with how a Shar-pei moves, but these dogs are powerfully built and crazy fast. I run into the building to get Sam and by the time we get out behind it to find the dog, she is GONE. No sign of her whatsoever.

Now, I know the girl can move. But, we were staring out at very flat fields, that have yet to be planted. It was bizarre not seeing any trace. We stood there a few minutes, calling and trying to puzzle out where she could have gone, then walked around calling for another twenty minutes, trying to see if we could figure out even which direction she may have headed. I was fighting down my panic, which I don't do particularly well under normal circumstances. For my pregnant self, this was almost too much.

It was freezing cold, drizzling, and the feed guy eventually came out, so I picked my way back through the mud to the car while Sam took care of things. He told the guy what had happened, and then we drove around a while, asking anyone we saw if they had seen a dog they didn't recognize wandering around. No one had. By this time, I couldn't hold the tears back anymore. You need to understand, I tend to fall in love pretty quickly with any living thing under my care (plants included) but this dog....this is "Sam's dog." And my heart was breaking for my poor husband. My mind was reeling with what I could do to ease the blow, who I needed to call, wracking my brain for breeders we had come across, determined to drive however far I needed to to find a replacement that very day, and that I was absolutely going to get the new dog microchipped!

Sam was holding it together really well, even using the awful circumstances to teach our girls why it's so important to stay by mom and dad in unknown places. :) "Look how upset Mom is, and that's just over Sadie! How do you think she'd feel if this was one of you??"

After I don't know how long, but to me it didn't seem long enough, Sam said, "I don't know what else we can do." I stared at him, aghast. "We're giving up?" He shrugged. "She's nowhere out here." The girls both started to whine and protest, close to tears themselves. I said, "We have to at least check in the other direction." So, Sam drove back the way we had come and THANK THE HEAVENS! Sadie had come back to the scene of her disappearance and the guy we bought the feed from was trying to lure her to him with a dog treat. :) It was pretty funny, watching, knowing her personality. She wasn't taking that treat from him for anything. She wasn't aggressive, but had her nose in the air, smelling for us, and had this look on her face, "I don't know you, so, no thanks." He had a leash in one hand, a treat in the other, and he had, bless his heart, followed her as she had gone across the street looking for us.

I was so grateful and so relieved. I was touched that this young man had taken the time to keep an eye out for our dog, and had tried to get her for us. It seems like such a basic thing to do, but unfortunately, the basics of human decency are becoming a lost art. I wanted to hop out and give this guy a big hug.

So, we got our darn dog back. :) I'm so glad. She really is a big part of our family, and even though I never thought I'd want a family dog, much less an indoor family dog, I love that wrinkly-faced sweetie pie.

And now, she never goes ANYWHERE without her harness and a leash. :)

Pure Genius

I have fallen in love.

Adele - Cold Shoulder

Adele - Rolling in the Deep

She is utterly brilliant.

Hello, Spring!

Today is a beautiful day, with perfect weather. The sun in shining and there is just a tiny chill in the air. Perfect day for working in the yard. Which is so what I want to do. But, I can't fight down the feeling of needing to puke. Maybe it's the migraine, or maybe it's the baby. :) I've had far too many days with this feeling during this pregnancy. :( Always so much to do, and feeling too much like crap to do it. UGH. I survived the first trimester with saltines and ginger altoids, hanging on, hopeful for the promised reprieve of the second trimester. Cue second trimester: two days of feeling NORMAL! It was awesome! ....then the yucky came back. And worse, the saltines and altoids don't cut it anymore. Sigh. All this is compounded because this is our busiest time of year: prepping the garden, getting new animals, mending fences and making other repairs the winter brought to our attention, seeing to a thousand things around the farm, not to mention trying to get the flowerbeds looking decent, and caring for the yard. The inside of the house normally gets a little neglected during this time anyway, but right now, I'm pretty much useless! It's driving me CRAZY!! BUT, it is gorgeous outside, and that makes me smile. I am grateful for the shining sun, and that feeling this badly means I have a little life growing inside me. I'm also grateful for an understanding husband, and kids who help me when I get into my "I WILL get up and work for 15 minutes even if I end up in the bathroom afterwards!!" My girls are fantastic. I'm so grateful for our friends who are sharing the garden with us this year, and ALL the work they have put in already. I'm so grateful for all the friends I have on standby ready to help with whatever, should I ask. I'm so grateful for the hard times in life, because it means the Lord has enough faith in me that I can get through it, and knowing that I will be stronger afterwards. I'm grateful for the beautiful birdsongs, and the bright, happy cardinals flitting around. I'm grateful for the amazing world we live in that refreshes and revives, no matter what happens to it. I'm grateful that my body is well enough to bring another baby into this world, that my blood pressure is perfect, and that the baby's heartbeat is strong! I'm very blessed. So, I guess if I can't be productive in this lovely spring weather, then at least I can use this time to enjoy it? :)